MOMMA WILL GIVE ADVICE.
ALWAYS REMEMBER: MENSTRUATING DOES NOT MAKE YOU BAD. IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE SICK. IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE DIRTY.
First of all, do not go swimming in the ocean to look for Momma.
Momma will be right here.
Momma suggests that at first sign of blood, take tylenol. If you are super in tune with your body, take it when you estimate it will start soon!
Momma knows EXACTLY what to do for cramps. Eating cranberries or drinking their juice is a wonderful way to get rid of cramps.
Another way to help with the pain is to rest on your bed like in the picture, butt in the air and head on the ground.
Also, if you do not like pads OR tampons, there are more solutions!
There is the softcup!
And the mooncup!
They are very similar to one another. They are basically soft, silicone cups that go up into your lady cave that collect the blood.The softcup is a bit more expensive.
Also, Momma says that if you want to have sex and not have gushing everywhere, you can use a softcup!
The mooncup is a lot like the softcup, but it is reusable. Momma will remind you that you MUST disinfect it in boiling water.
You can even use natural sea sponge like a tampon!
Momma says it’s okay.
There are also cotton reusable pads!
Momma is also thinking of you men that have periods, too!
There is a special kind of boxers that you can buy with a special pocket for sanitary products! It also comes with a bulge.
The most important thing to do, menstruating or not, is to love and respect yourself. Do not feel ashamed, and get through it as well as you can!
Momma loves you!
Thank you momma.
I imagine Momma having a really typical haggard old smoker’s voice
MOMMA’S ON MY OWN DASH WHAT THE HECKLE
WAIT HOLD THE PHONE THERE ARE OPTIONS OUTSIDE OF PADS AND TAMPONS???
can i just say i love how momma includes trans men?? and thank you momma for the advice <3
I love momma! Everyone should follow momma because her and the rest of the sea family give amazing advice
TALKING ABOUT OPTIONS OTHER THAN PADS/TAMPONS IS REALLY IMPORTANT because pads are okay but can be messy and feel really conspicuous which is bad for people for whom menstruating makes them feel sad/depressed/dysphoric. And taMPONS ARE REALLY BAD FOR YOU.
Toxic shock syndrome might sound like something they try to scare you about in highschool but it’s serious shit and actually more common than a lot of people thing. (If you’ve ever felt really suddenly feverish/dizzy/nauseous while using a tampon THAT MIGHT HAVE BEEN TSS) and even if the suckers don’t dry out your ~internal area~ so much that tss-causing bacteria can start growing most of them also contain BLEACH AHHHHH BLEACH UP THERE IS NO GOOD or other chemicals that you should really just not be sticking up there whoaman. They can even GROW MOLD mold that you can’t see because it’s covered up by the applicator until you stick it where it goes. Plus, they’re kiiiiiind of pretty bad for plumbing and the environment when you flush them. Also they’re super uncomfortable for a lot of people (me) and the cups are actually MORE comfortable, desipite looking bigger, because they are squishier and DON’T LEAK AS MUCH.
So yes this is a GREAT post and
ANYONE WHO MENSTRUATES, REGARDLESS OF GENDER, SHOULD TAKE THIS INFO INTO ACCOUNT.
BUT ALSO I HAVE MORE TO TELL YOU
Tori’s Tips for Menstrual Cramps:
I did not have bad cramps until college which sucks but happens sometimes. Here’s what I have learned helps…
-heating pad/hot water bottles WHOA MIRACLE CURE
-hot beverages CALMING HERBAL TEA WHAT’S UUUUPPP
-tensing your pelvic muscles/bearing down FORCE THAT GROSSNESS AWAY
-orgasms. WINK WONK SEXY WEXY TIME
-hot bath/shower LIKE A HEATING PAD BUT LUXURIOUS
-walking/light exercise I KNOW IT SUCKS BUT MOVING A LITTLE HELPS YO
Things You Should Totally Not Do While Bleeding:
-use tampons that are more absorbent than what you need ASKING FOR TSS THERE
-scrub your lower region aggressively with soap no matter how gross you feel GAVE MYSELF A YEAST INFECTION NEVER DOING THAT SHIT AGAIN
-feel ashamed or dirty LIKE MOMMA SAID
-put up with jokes about periods/pms THIS IS NEVER ACCEPTABLE TBH
-not make time for self-care TAKING TIME TO MAKE YOURSELF FEEL GOOD IS THE BEST WAY TO BATTLE MENSTRUAL BLUEZZZ.